Your Perception of Me is a Reflection of You; My Reaction to You is an Awareness of Me
If I could sum up the definition of how we can all be mirrors to each other's inside world, it would be the title of this blog. The reason you come into relationship with others is to become aware of yourself. It doesn't matter what type of relationship it is either - spouse, friend, business colleague, child, parent, sibling, stranger - the people who trigger you the most are there for your personal evolution and healing.
The trick is becoming aware of the personal lesson you are meant to learn through each relationship and not closing yourself off to it. If you do, and you choose to end the relationship or somehow avoid the lesson with one person, the Universe will simply send another person into your life that will trigger the same reaction from you until you get it. And the crazy thing is that all of these people could be showing up in a completely new way, yet your perception of them will be similar because you are seeing them through the filter of your own personal reality.
This is where it gets tricky because to you it seems as though it is the same type of person, or relationship dynamic, but what is the common denominator here? You. Are you taking responsibility for the unconscious patterns and filters that are still operating underneath your perception of reality? What we see on the outside is a reflection of what's happening on the inside, always. Everyone's personal experiences and level of awareness will be the determining factors in what they see and how they interpret things. What filter may you still be seeing the world through, that if you chose to look at it from a different perspective, could change what you believe to be true?
To give a personal example, I had acne as a teenager. It was something I struggled with for years and it gave me very low self-esteem, or I had low self-esteem and it caused the acne, I don't know which came first. I felt ugly and unwanted by others, especially by boys when compared to all of the other girls who had perfect glowing skin. As a young adult I learned how to take better care of my skin and learned how it was connected to my emotional state as well, so now my skin looks better today. I cannot even say that it looks amazing, as this is still not the filter I see my skin through, even if others think so.
This is what prompted this realization for me - someone complimented my skin and I was taken aback. Every time I look in the mirror I still see every flaw, every red mark, every zit, even if they are tiny and quite non existent now. But that's the filter I see myself through still to this day - that pimple faced teenager who felt ugly and unwanted. On a physical level, that's how it was still showing up, and on a deeper level it was playing out in my inability to see myself as mature, professional, capable, or responsible as an adult.
There's a part of me that still sees the world through the eyes of a damaged teenage girl who wants to be irresponsible and hide from the world. I have been attempting to grow up and take responsibility for myself and my life, yet there is always this voice that tells me I'm not pretty enough, mature enough, responsible enough, or smart enough to do the things I want to do. It shows up in how I treat myself in business, in relationships, and how I view myself. It doesn't matter if everyone else around me thinks I am capable of doing anything if I don't believe it for myself.
And the Universe will continue to bring me into relationships where this is tested and triggered so I can finally shift my perspective and choose not to play into it any longer. I have to let go and stop blaming the outside for how I feel on the inside because how I feel is my responsibility and mine alone. No one is making me feel a certain way about myself, that was already there within me to be heard and felt and seen - and they are simply drawing it out of me to be released. It wants to be integrated and healed, and if I can see this as my reality, instead of the unconscious emotional filter, I can move through it and past it to make wiser decisions.
If I could leave you with one thing, it would be this - you have more power over your reality than you may believe to be possible by deliberately choosing to shift your perspective. Step out of your head and emotional body and question their thoughts, sensations, and actions. They are messengers and they are there to serve you in moving forward along your path. This will take dedication, practice, and effort but it is always possible.
I believe in you, and I believe in me. If you need support, please book a session with me here.
Sending you so much power and love!