• Bethany Evans

The Paradox of Chasing Perfection

Updated: Jun 24, 2019

Something I have noticed lately is that one of the most confusing aspects of living as a Human here on Earth is our inability to comprehend the paradoxical nature of the Universe. A paradox can be described as "an opinion or statement contrary to commonly accepted opinion," meaning despite what may seem like the way to do something, or what to believe about something, the opposite is actually true. This is the mirror reflection the Universe is providing us always, with everything and everyone. A mirror image is our opposite - it is still us, and true, but we often forget that we are connected to everything in our reality in this way while living in the third dimension, and that what is being shown to us on the outside is in fact, a reflection of who we already are on the inside.

This can be a tough pill to swallow when what shows up on the outside isn't something that we enjoy, and this is where I believe we get caught in a trap of illusion. We tell ourselves (and especially if we are woke and aware of the Law of Attraction, which pretty much everyone is now a days), that there must be something "wrong" with us and our manifesting abilities, with our vibration, with our thoughts, with our intentions, if we are attracting such an uncomfortable, difficult, scary, or intense situation on the outside - so we begin to find new ways to do it "right." We must not be practicing the Law of Attraction perfectly because what we asked for didn't show up in a perfectly packaged box all tied up with a neat bow. Right?!

Well I am here to tell you my friends that THAT belief will completely halt your growth. The definition of perfect is "conforming absolutely to the description or definition of an ideal type," with the key word here being CONFORMING. And to conform means to "act in accord with the prevailing standards, attitudes, practices, etc. of society or a group." So we begin chasing after the most popular training, or course, or self-help tools in order to "fix" what must be wrong with us, because of the beliefs we are adopting about what has shown up in our lives on the outside. Which, because we now understand that everything is a reflection of us, cannot be right, because it is not perfect - meaning the ideal picture of what we had imagined or what is deemed appropriate by society. A very rigid belief with zero forgiveness of being anything other than what someone else has claimed is "perfect," (which will look and feel different for every individual, depending on our culture and environment, but it doesn't exclude anyone from the general idea of what perfection means).

And here is where chasing perfection becomes a paradox - we are already perfect, whole and complete as we are. Everything that is showing up on the outside exists within us, otherwise we wouldn't have attracted it. If we resist, fight, push away, hate, avoid, or deny what is happening, we are not accepting and loving this aspect of ourselves, and therefore we are chasing something else that we will NEVER be able to attain, because the power is found by going within, and not focusing without. If what shows up isn't something we particularly enjoy, what does that mean about how we feel about ourselves? Who told us it wasn't okay to feel, think, act, or be this way? Is it actually destructive and unhealthy, or is it simply a chance to see the love that exists there, that WANTS to be loved? If it is destructive and unhealthy, what do we need to do for ourselves in order to change these patterns? This is where our power lies, and it always comes from what WE choose to do, NOT what everyone else says is the most popular way to fix what's wrong.

By the way, I am not saying that everything everyone creates in the self-help world is not beneficial and doesn't change peoples lives for the better - rather, I am inviting you to recognize if you get caught up in the fads and trends instead of listening to your own inner guidance, like me. If I spend too much time on social media I can get sucked in to everyone else's world of what they're doing and begin thinking that I should also be doing those things to be more successful, pretty, smart, powerful, etc. But in doing that, I am not honoring where I am on my own personal journey, and I am avoiding doing my own work. This does show how so very powerful we all are, though, that we have this ability to influence others to do something that they may not have thought to do before, and this is another point - becoming mindful and aware of the intentions behind what we do, say, and share with others.

Are we coming from a place of service and authenticity, or from a place of wanting to fix ourselves through controlling others? Another hard pill to swallow, once we realize that is where we are unconsciously operating from. But never fear, because once the awareness is gained, the shift can occur and we've taken our power back once again! So please remember that perfection is not something we can attain, because it already exists within us, and it's all a matter of perspective anyway. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so are you able to hold this view of yourself as perfect, beautiful, whole, and pure, no matter the details of who, what, where, when, and how it is being presented? If so, you've claimed your power and freedom from the chase! Bravo!

And fuck what everyone else thinks, anyway!

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